The death of someone you love deeply is probably the most devastating experience that will ever happen to you. And our concern as a church family is to bring you our love and support as much as we can.
Grief affects different people in different ways. But it does have an overall pattern, and it may help to know that you are not on your own in what you feel. It is also true that the feelings of sadness may be very intense, but they will not last like that forever.
When a death occurs life can be turned upside down! You may feel you want to go into hiding from everything. But it is usually true that practical tasks need to be done. And they may actually help. Together with regular routines (or new ones) they will hold together the framework of your life.
It can take time for it to sink in that someone has died. It is hard to believe they wont walk in through the door, or be there when you visit. The funeral service and friends will help you to accept what is difficult to take in.
It is quite normal to be left asking the question ‘why?’ – even when we know death comes to us all. The bible tells us death is an unwelcome enemy into God’s world, and there’s something inside us that feels it is wrong for our loved one to have died. This can lead you to get angry when you wouldn’t usually react in that way. This is normal.
It is also perfectly understandable to go through an ‘if only’ stage… ‘if only I’d got to the doctor sooner…’ Or ‘if only we hadn’t argued so much…’ It is hard to remember we are ordinary human beings who make mistakes. Every relationship has had its problems.
You may feel depressed. You may especially wonder how to cope with anniversaries etc when they come up. Jesus once said something that people have found helpful whether or not they are Christians. He said ‘Don’t worry about tomorrow, let the day’s own trouble be sufficient for the day.’ In other words think as far as bedtime tonight. You’ll be given help to get to the day’s end… and tomorrow you’ll be given a fresh supply of grace to live.
In time you will also find yourself directing your love towards others, and that will bring healing and often open up a new chapter to your life.
Many have felt God calling them to a new relationship with him. One of the ways he reveals his love is through people. That’s why we’d like to give you a personal invitation to join our church family.
Simply come along on a Sunday morning at 10:30 it will strengthen you. Or we can help you to get there so that you walk in with a friend.
Or please phone us, we’ll continue to be there for you.